Friday, March 29, 2013

Baby of the Family?

To Whom it May Concern;

Growing up as the youngest in a large family is harder than most people expect. You become the target, the manipulator of parents, the baby, the irresponsible one, the incapable of functioning independently... well that last one might just be me, but maybe it is you too.

The older kids of a large family are the pioneers, the adventurers who brave the outside world for the first time, while the younger ones are left behind. We follow in the footsteps of these giants, these examples, or at least we want to. We think that if they can do it then so can we. There is some truth in it. As the youngest, it has been my experience that the closer your parental units come to becoming empty-nesters the closer they try to hold onto you.

It's not enough for them to merely be as overprotective as they have been during the course of your whole life, they worry that you are some fragile thing that might break. There is truth in this too. You are not forged out of the wanderlust-driven material that your siblings are crafted from. You have been on a relatively easy path and never faced the rugged terrain that seemingly all other people have crossed.

At some point in your life you realize that someone else has taken care of you for the majority of it. At some point you tremble at the vast expanse of world there is out there and the responsibilities assigned to you (either spoken or more frighteningly unspoken).

Making phone calls, paying bills, opening bank accounts, closing bank accounts, paying taxes, getting a job, shopping for groceries, cleaning your bathroom...

suddenly feeding yourself seems to have become one of the most difficult things in the world.
Ironically, it is like you are a baby again.
A helpless infant learns from its parents.
An ignorant (yet capable) adult learns from direct experience. For those people out there who never learned to function independently, your parents didn't teach you autonomy. Being your own self with your own responsibilities is one of the fundamental things that a child needs. You need it to survive in the world.

I have already started my journey for independence, but for you I will recount to you those first treks into the unknown. Watch and learn as I grow up for realz

Sincerely,
Independent Month

3 comments:

  1. As the oldest of five, it's valuable for me to have insight like this. My youngest sibling, my only sister, just turned 21 and is in college. We've led two very different lives, but those who seem to have struggled the most in our family are the second oldest and the second youngest. Funny how it all works out.

    Stopping by to wish you good luck with the A-to-Z! Just a note, but your Word Verification is on. Some may skip blogs with WV on during the A-to-Z, and many blog authors don't know it's on to begin with, so it's worth mentioning, just in case.

    Shannon at The Warrior Muse

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    1. Thanks! I didn't realize the Verification was on.

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  2. Hello this post seems to have been in the wrong spot? It's a B one isn't it? Ah well, nevertheless here I am again . I feel like these were written just for me . I am so lucky :D

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